Pre-Surgery Update – 3/9/05

Thank you so much for your prayers. I have been doing much better in regard to my thoughts. Also, the insurance company came through with the approval in time to stay on schedule for surgery.

Speaking of surgery, it is scheduled for this Friday, March 11. I have come down with a cold that seems to be a little worse today. I'm on an antibiotic, so it should take care of any infection that could be brewing. However, I can feel the cold has moved down into my chest a bit today, so I would really appreciate prayers about that not interfering with surgery.

I received some very good news on Monday. The results of the heart test came back and my heart function has not changed at all since the beginning of treatment. This is a HUGE praise because it means that I can continue my treatment and my heart hasn't been damaged. It also means that the episodes I've been having with my heart (I had another one on Thursday) are just 'incidental' and could have nothing to do with treatment, other than the fact that my body has been under so much stress. I have an appointment with the cardiologist tomorrow to talk to him about all of those things.

The rest of my eyebrows and eyelashes fell out this morning. That means they are making room for the new ones that will start growing. My hair is also starting to fill in more on top. It's been weird having such great thick hair all around my head except for on the top! Now I can relate to men with male pattern baldness! There seems to be no end to the people to which I can now relate.

God has been teaching me a lot lately about my appearance. I shared a little in my last update about this, but it continues to be the biggest challenge for me. I am so thankful for God's Word, since He gives me such specific wisdom in this area. Here are some of the verses I am clinging to right now:

The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart. 1 Samuel 16:7b

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. 1 Peter 3:3-4

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Proverbs 31:30

All of these verses help to remind me that my femininity comes from within, not from whether or not I have long hair or beautiful eyelashes. One of my favorite sayings has always been, "God knows my heart and loves me anyway!" I know that He is shaping me and molding me into the 'beautiful' person He wants me to be. I'm also thankful that He is compassionate and patient with me as I learn these lessons.

Well, unless you hear more from me, I will catch up with you all after surgery. Please keep the surgery and my recovery in your prayers. By next week at this time, I hope to be doing well and enjoying my new "upper chest area". (After all, this is G-rated!) Love you all!